Tuesday, March 10, 2015

Therapy incoming (10/28/14)

Nerves nerves nerves.  I'm scheduled for my first ever visit to a place of therapy.  I went to a different place, once, to get my diagnosis, but that was just to test what already exists.  This, and the subsequent visits, will be to change the seemingly delicate, hard-earned mindset I've developed over the years.  We're not playing with prescriptions, but we are playing with electricity and my brain.  It's a therapy called LENS.  Experimental evidence behind it is conflicted, but it seems to either do something good or nothing at all.  There are scads of case studies supporting it, with beneficial effects in up to 70% of those who try it.    

It's not the most promising start, but maybe it'll do something.  My problems are less "needs immediate fix" and more "improving the quality of life" related.  Essentially, I operate under a perpetually pessimistic, even cynical, mood, with a healthy dose of "everything makes me nervous."  I hold down my jobs, I see my friends, I pursue hobbies... But I don't really have fun doing so.  Fun is honestly kind of a foreign concept to me.  If I've had fun in an evening, I usually don't realize it.  If I do, it's right before I get home.  Not exactly useful.

So the LENS therapy may improve my overall mood, reduce the anxiety, and maybe help with sound sensitivity.  It'd be nice.  I'm almost 26, and I'm only getting to this now because I shouldn't ignore it any longer.  Just because I didn't get started with therapy early doesn't mean I can't benefit from it.  I hope. 

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