Wednesday, February 7, 2018

Legwork and Life, week of 2/7/18

House Hunting

The closing was finally scheduled, and there seems to be no further complications as of yet... save that the closing was scheduled at an office that's over an hour away from where any of us live.  So Chris is going to have to take the morning off, so we can drive two hours in a day, just to sign some paperwork in person.  This seems completely absurd to me.  I live near a city, and the closest place is toward the rural side of the state, away from my city, the capital, and most forms of civilization?  Ridiculous.

Needless to say, I'm not looking forward to the trip, but it would, I suppose, be the last wrinkle with having to deal with the bank and such.  There's still the "we need to hire a moving company for the heaviest stuff" and the actual moving process, which I don't expect to be any fun, but at least that'll be more familiar than this is...

Runaway Tooth Story

This previous weekend was kind of horrid, in large part because I effectively lost part of a tooth down the sink...  

To be precise, I lost a crown off my lower back molar.  I have genetically weak teeth, and on top of that, brushing my teeth is a hideous experience, so when I lived in a place without fluoride in the water for a few years, the rot-fairy came calling, and dental-related suffering ensued through high school and college.  This crown was one such result.  I have since improved in my ability to tolerate taking care of my teeth, and added an electric toothbrush to my cleaning routine, but that won't make the crown go away, naturally.

Apparently, flossing will make it go away, though!  Or at least go flying.  I was flossing my back teeth when it popped out and bounced around the sink.  I lost sight of it, and promptly assumed it had gone down the drain, since that's where I'd last seen it.  Needless to say, I was upset...  So I woke my poor spouse, who had been sleeping quite peacefully, and we went to get a specialty wrench to take the sink apart so we could locate the silly crown.  

It turns out that it's not that hard to take apart a sink, but the parts you don't normally look at can get really revolting in very short order.  We'd only been living in this place for less than 4 years, and there was hair and a soil-y substance and rot... It was disgusting.  After cleaning out the pipe and sink parts, we couldn't find my crown, either... so I got started on cleaning up the bathroom after all that... and found the stupid crown in the overflow sink catch, mostly clean.  

We'd bought some temporary dental adhesive while we were out for the wrench, so after I scrubbed the crown, washed it off, and disinfected it, I was able to put it back in... crookedly.  It took me an hour or so to realize I'd messed up, but when I tried to get it back out, I couldn't.  Which is how we ended up buying me saltwater taffy to try to dislodge it...  

Turns out, for anyone curious, saltwater taffy is stickiest when it's just out of the wrapper.  So you pop it into your mouth directly onto the spot you're trying to get stuck, then moosh your mouth shut and then open.  I've never tried to purposely lose a tooth or something like that before, but if you ever need to, this is one way how.

I got it back out again, cleaned the glue out of it, and reapplied more glue, this time making sure I put it in right.  I definitely put too much glue in, because the crown was too high when I was done, but Monday afternoon, when the dentist was able to see me, he complimented my work, saying it was the best he'd ever seen, and that maybe I should consider a job in dentistry.  I assume he was kidding, but I wisely didn't tell him that I'd be miserable doing his job...  

So anyway, I got the tooth fixed on Monday, and after a few hours of suffering, my mouth seems to be back to normal.  Found out two things, though.  First, my dentist office has new lights, which do such a good job curing the glue that they also "cook" the gums if the users aren't careful.  So I've been introduced to a new form of pain.  I didn't really register it as heat, but it was definitely painful.  

The second is that the temporary dental adhesive is full of gross crap, and I felt like garbage after ingesting some of it.  I checked the package for the ingredients afterwards... two forms of aluminum and petroleum jelly, along with various other things.  The ill effects lasted several hours, and made me wonder whether I was poisoning myself on accident...   I seem to be more or less okay now, though, so maybe I haven't damaged myself permanently.  

I am, however, planning on buying a big container of Draino (drain clog cleaner) and pouring it down the bathroom sink, possibly while chanting something suitable for exorcising demons.  I wasn't expecting such a horrifying mess inside my nice, clean-looking sink, and the revealed truth has made me rather ill.  Death by harsh chemicals seems like a fitting consequence for my trauma.  

Next week we'll close on the house, and after that, start planning to bid this apartment good riddance!

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