http://www.thinkingautismguide.com/2019/05/parenting-kids-with-disabilities-how-to.html
I'm not a parent. I'm an adult that used to be a kid raised by parents. So my insight here is limited. What I do have is a background in psychology.
Humans are a social species. We developed around the concept of tribes, in-groups, essentially. Our technology level has far outstripped this concept and made it possible to be part of an absolutely dizzying number of "tribes," but the basic need to be recognized, understood, and have people to lean on remains the same.
Being an autism parent, I've come to see, can be a very alienating experience. Your kid(s), regardless of their specific capabilities, is/are going to be a lot more difficult to raise than neurotypical children. That is not your fault. It is nobody's fault. It simply is, and it falls to you to handle it.
That does not mean you should handle it alone. The same advice given to autistic self-advocates applies to you too: Find Your Tribe. Look for community resources. My own community has at least three parent support groups specifically for autism parents (one is entirely in Spanish!). Call autism organizations like the Arc and the Autism Society. Check into group-finding services like MeetUp. Check on forums, in online communities. Ask around in your church, if you attend one.
The phrase "no man is an island" comes from a piece of poetry, but it's particularly true in the modern age. The house I live in, I couldn't build. The computer I work on, I built from component pieces, but I couldn't build those pieces if you put the raw materials and tools in front of me. The food I eat, I didn't grow and don't really know how it came to the grocery store. If my car breaks, it's almost immediately a trip to the mechanic, because I can only fix very minor problems with it. We live in a very interconnected, very dependent world.
Please, if you don't have a support network for this kind of thing, you need it. Fellow parents have insights, ideas, and comradery. One of the major indicators for how well an autistic kid will do in life, is how well their parents are while raising them. Take care of yourself. Find people that support you. Crises will happen, but they're easier handled with the help of others.
Find your tribe. Find respite care. Find what you need. Please.
I'm not a parent. I'm an adult that used to be a kid raised by parents. So my insight here is limited. What I do have is a background in psychology.
Humans are a social species. We developed around the concept of tribes, in-groups, essentially. Our technology level has far outstripped this concept and made it possible to be part of an absolutely dizzying number of "tribes," but the basic need to be recognized, understood, and have people to lean on remains the same.
Being an autism parent, I've come to see, can be a very alienating experience. Your kid(s), regardless of their specific capabilities, is/are going to be a lot more difficult to raise than neurotypical children. That is not your fault. It is nobody's fault. It simply is, and it falls to you to handle it.
That does not mean you should handle it alone. The same advice given to autistic self-advocates applies to you too: Find Your Tribe. Look for community resources. My own community has at least three parent support groups specifically for autism parents (one is entirely in Spanish!). Call autism organizations like the Arc and the Autism Society. Check into group-finding services like MeetUp. Check on forums, in online communities. Ask around in your church, if you attend one.
The phrase "no man is an island" comes from a piece of poetry, but it's particularly true in the modern age. The house I live in, I couldn't build. The computer I work on, I built from component pieces, but I couldn't build those pieces if you put the raw materials and tools in front of me. The food I eat, I didn't grow and don't really know how it came to the grocery store. If my car breaks, it's almost immediately a trip to the mechanic, because I can only fix very minor problems with it. We live in a very interconnected, very dependent world.
Please, if you don't have a support network for this kind of thing, you need it. Fellow parents have insights, ideas, and comradery. One of the major indicators for how well an autistic kid will do in life, is how well their parents are while raising them. Take care of yourself. Find people that support you. Crises will happen, but they're easier handled with the help of others.
Find your tribe. Find respite care. Find what you need. Please.
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