This week was definitely another mix of good and bad.
The bad, mainly, was that I spent about three days in near-complete misery. About once a month, I bitterly regret having two X chromosomes instead of an X and a Y chromosome. This regret (and the suffering that sparks it) tends to last about a day. Sometimes a day and a half. In recent months, the amount of time has gone up. I hadn't really noticed the pain ramping up alongside it, but... then I was a grump for several days before my period started... and then in blinding pain once it started.
I'm generally not a "stay in bed" sort of person when it comes to being ill. I prefer to be actively trying to mitigate my misery, keeping hydrated, eating good food, or at least getting some work done with activities to do while sick. That was not an option for the very first day. It was pretty much lie in bed or lie in bed. Every movement hurt.
The only odd factor out in all of this was my dairy consumption. I'd been eating more dairy in recent months due to stress. But other than that, I seemed pretty much on track for having less awful periods. A friend of mine pointed out yesterday that dairy tends to include estrogen and growth hormones, because of the focus on milk production. So maybe that's it. I really hope that's it, because this really needs to not happen again.
The other major shoddy point this week happened Sunday morning, after most of the agony of my period had subsided. I went to church, as I always do, but found the main church service too loud and painful to properly worship in. My light and sound sensitivities were acting up. When this happens, I self-accommodate by going to a side room where the service was piped in, but the volume could be adjusted, and the lights dimmed. All was going well, until halfway through the sermon, one of the facility staff walked in and told me I should "consider vacating the room because others want to use it."
I was confused, naturally. Although I'd been tempted, in the past, to put up a sign saying "sensory-friendly church," I never had. People wandered in and through the room with annoying frequency, and I didn't stop them or even say anything. I just wanted to be allowed to worship. When I mentioned all of that, the staff informed me that a nursing mother wanted to use the room, and didn't care to do so in my presence. And then underlined that I should "consider others' needs."
So, basically, I got politely chased out of my own church. Or to be more precise, I left when it became clear that my reasons for being there weren't important to the staff, and there was nowhere else for me to go. I spent the rest of the church service crying in the car while I composed an email to the staff who had wronged me.
Their response came in at the tail end of the day, and could basically be summarized as, "This isn't my fault, so don't be mad at me." I am, needless to say, exceedingly disappointed. I let them know that I had just as much right to be using that room as anyone else, particularly considering the room's accommodations, and told them there would be no repeats of the day's events. Which I hope they will understand as, "You and your guilt trip can bugger right off next time."
I'm still fairly upset about the whole thing. My spouse and I contribute financially to the church, and I volunteer my time and effort on a very regular basis to support the church's functioning. I run the sound board once a month, and every week in the winter, I clear the snow off the solar panels. I may not be listed as a member of the church, but I certainly do sufficient work to count as someone that should matter... and really, even if I didn't... I'm disabled, and Jesus loved the weakest among humanity (the poor, the exiles, and the children) most. This particular church, which has a thriving set of programs to help refugees and immigrants, should do better than this.
I kept the original correspondence between myself and the staff member at fault simply between us, as I'd rather hoped they would recognize how immensely cruel and thoughtless they'd been if I explained my position. So far, they've disappointed me. I suppose if I'm still angry about it by next Sunday, I'll speak to the minister of congregational life about the matter.
That was, thankfully, the last crappy thing that happened this week. After I finished crying and sending the email to the thoughtless staff, my spouse and I went off to a special Mothers' Day brunch at a fancy restaurant. The food was good, and we got to see my mother, my grandmother, and my dad. I had to really strain to not let the storm of hurt and anger I was feeling ruin the brunch, but I think I did okay.
After the brunch, there was a really unusual but fun outing. A friend of mine had gotten ahold of some tickets to a symphony orchestra performance, specifically a performance of the music of John Williams. This composer is best known for his work in Star Wars, Harry Potter, and Indiana Jones, but he's done tons of other things, also. So the concert was various pieces he wrote, performed live by the local symphony orchestra. Between getting to see my friend, the excellence of the music, and the excellence of the performers, I had a pretty good time. I did have to resort to earplugs. But after the morning I'd had, that was kind of inevitable.
There's one more piece of good news to relate. I can't remember if I've mentioned it on the blog, but my house came with a big bathtub, with jets. I was initially very much looking forward to using this tub, because it's actually large enough for me to relax in. When I tried it, though, I found out that our water heater is not spacious enough to actually fill the whole tub... and the end result is a lukewarm tub. Not really suitable for a long bath. Or even a short one.
After boiling some potatoes in our largest pot, I realized that I might be able to offset the problem. I simply needed to use that same massive pot, boil a lot of water in it, and add that water to the tub. On Monday, I tried just that. It worked! Actually, I majorly overdid it, and the water was too hot to be enjoyed, even after adding tons of cold water. But that is a much more manageable problem than replacing the entire water heater. So once I figure out the right balance for optimal water temperature, I should be good to enjoy hot baths whenever I want them! I'm excited.
The bad, mainly, was that I spent about three days in near-complete misery. About once a month, I bitterly regret having two X chromosomes instead of an X and a Y chromosome. This regret (and the suffering that sparks it) tends to last about a day. Sometimes a day and a half. In recent months, the amount of time has gone up. I hadn't really noticed the pain ramping up alongside it, but... then I was a grump for several days before my period started... and then in blinding pain once it started.
I'm generally not a "stay in bed" sort of person when it comes to being ill. I prefer to be actively trying to mitigate my misery, keeping hydrated, eating good food, or at least getting some work done with activities to do while sick. That was not an option for the very first day. It was pretty much lie in bed or lie in bed. Every movement hurt.
The only odd factor out in all of this was my dairy consumption. I'd been eating more dairy in recent months due to stress. But other than that, I seemed pretty much on track for having less awful periods. A friend of mine pointed out yesterday that dairy tends to include estrogen and growth hormones, because of the focus on milk production. So maybe that's it. I really hope that's it, because this really needs to not happen again.
The other major shoddy point this week happened Sunday morning, after most of the agony of my period had subsided. I went to church, as I always do, but found the main church service too loud and painful to properly worship in. My light and sound sensitivities were acting up. When this happens, I self-accommodate by going to a side room where the service was piped in, but the volume could be adjusted, and the lights dimmed. All was going well, until halfway through the sermon, one of the facility staff walked in and told me I should "consider vacating the room because others want to use it."
I was confused, naturally. Although I'd been tempted, in the past, to put up a sign saying "sensory-friendly church," I never had. People wandered in and through the room with annoying frequency, and I didn't stop them or even say anything. I just wanted to be allowed to worship. When I mentioned all of that, the staff informed me that a nursing mother wanted to use the room, and didn't care to do so in my presence. And then underlined that I should "consider others' needs."
So, basically, I got politely chased out of my own church. Or to be more precise, I left when it became clear that my reasons for being there weren't important to the staff, and there was nowhere else for me to go. I spent the rest of the church service crying in the car while I composed an email to the staff who had wronged me.
Their response came in at the tail end of the day, and could basically be summarized as, "This isn't my fault, so don't be mad at me." I am, needless to say, exceedingly disappointed. I let them know that I had just as much right to be using that room as anyone else, particularly considering the room's accommodations, and told them there would be no repeats of the day's events. Which I hope they will understand as, "You and your guilt trip can bugger right off next time."
I'm still fairly upset about the whole thing. My spouse and I contribute financially to the church, and I volunteer my time and effort on a very regular basis to support the church's functioning. I run the sound board once a month, and every week in the winter, I clear the snow off the solar panels. I may not be listed as a member of the church, but I certainly do sufficient work to count as someone that should matter... and really, even if I didn't... I'm disabled, and Jesus loved the weakest among humanity (the poor, the exiles, and the children) most. This particular church, which has a thriving set of programs to help refugees and immigrants, should do better than this.
I kept the original correspondence between myself and the staff member at fault simply between us, as I'd rather hoped they would recognize how immensely cruel and thoughtless they'd been if I explained my position. So far, they've disappointed me. I suppose if I'm still angry about it by next Sunday, I'll speak to the minister of congregational life about the matter.
That was, thankfully, the last crappy thing that happened this week. After I finished crying and sending the email to the thoughtless staff, my spouse and I went off to a special Mothers' Day brunch at a fancy restaurant. The food was good, and we got to see my mother, my grandmother, and my dad. I had to really strain to not let the storm of hurt and anger I was feeling ruin the brunch, but I think I did okay.
After the brunch, there was a really unusual but fun outing. A friend of mine had gotten ahold of some tickets to a symphony orchestra performance, specifically a performance of the music of John Williams. This composer is best known for his work in Star Wars, Harry Potter, and Indiana Jones, but he's done tons of other things, also. So the concert was various pieces he wrote, performed live by the local symphony orchestra. Between getting to see my friend, the excellence of the music, and the excellence of the performers, I had a pretty good time. I did have to resort to earplugs. But after the morning I'd had, that was kind of inevitable.
There's one more piece of good news to relate. I can't remember if I've mentioned it on the blog, but my house came with a big bathtub, with jets. I was initially very much looking forward to using this tub, because it's actually large enough for me to relax in. When I tried it, though, I found out that our water heater is not spacious enough to actually fill the whole tub... and the end result is a lukewarm tub. Not really suitable for a long bath. Or even a short one.
After boiling some potatoes in our largest pot, I realized that I might be able to offset the problem. I simply needed to use that same massive pot, boil a lot of water in it, and add that water to the tub. On Monday, I tried just that. It worked! Actually, I majorly overdid it, and the water was too hot to be enjoyed, even after adding tons of cold water. But that is a much more manageable problem than replacing the entire water heater. So once I figure out the right balance for optimal water temperature, I should be good to enjoy hot baths whenever I want them! I'm excited.
No comments:
Post a Comment