College diploma (and graduation) (8/27/14)

My college diploma*, which I had to unearth today for my job paperwork.  I guess they didn't even bother noting I achieved it in psychology.  I was extremely underwhelmed at the time I received this fancy piece of paper, and my feelings don't seem to have changed.  By the time the pomp and circumstance of the graduation ceremony arrived, I'd felt graduated and done for at least two months.

I walked with my class because my brother hadn't gotten to walk, thus (accidentally) depriving my parents of their chance to sit proudly in their seats and be very happy as their child crossed the stage to receive a fancy piece of paper from college.  So I sat through the enthusiasm and the preening and the strutting.  I got very annoyed with it all by halfway through the celebratory breakfast.  At which point, I took a bookmark that was part of our graduation packets, folded it up into a flag, and wrote "YAY" on it in sharpie.  Every time we were supposed to clap, I'd wave it, deadpan, rather than express any faked emotion or enthusiasm.

The sarcastic YAY flag

I should probably explain.  The value of an education is apparent to me.  I learned a great deal while in college, some of which I doubt I'd have learned elsewhere.  I made friends and I got a degree that tells people I subscribe to the system.  This is all very good.  It's the ceremony I hate.  By the time they got around to handing me my fancy piece of paper, I had all the knowledge required to graduate and more.  That knowledge was what I studied for, lost sleep over, took classes I didn't care about, and occasionally cursed my own existence over.  Once I had that knowledge, the ceremony was just a social construct for everyone else to be happy about.  Useless to me, save that it made my parents happy.  It did not, however, stop my father from saying, no more than half an hour after the ceremony: "So have you thought about going to grad school?"  Ah, parents...

As I put the fancy piece of paper away again, I have to muse that I still really don't care about the degree.  I'm more than a fancy piece of paper.  I guess we don't have a better way of shorthanding, "I'm a worthwhile person" than fancy pieces of paper.

*my middle name is blacked out because I don't like it that much and you don't really need to know it.